An Audience of One

Who is your audience? Sometimes we care too much what others think. How cool would it be if we did the right thing, at the right time, no matter who was watching? And, of equal importance, how cool would it be if we did the right thing no matter what others think of us. Now that would be freedom!

I first experienced an example of this back at Emerson Jr. High in Los Angeles. I was in 9th grade, and our school was hosting a sporting event - one that I had, up until then, never heard of before. It was a “Teachers v. Students” basketball game. It was not played in a gym - rather an outdoor basketball court on the playground. Bleachers were set-up along side the court, and students and faculty cheered on the team that they wanted to earn the “W”.

It was a big turn out for the Jr. High, and most of us were routing for the 9th grade students to pull off the impossible. Although I was a good athlete, I was not playing in the game. I joined the spectators.

As the game got underway, one student rose above my expectations - Brett. He managed to score some baskets, grab some rebounds and overall looked pretty impressive. However, the memory that stuck with me was not of his play - rather of his attitude and a decision he made just as the game ended.

You see, during the game, Brett’s mom was quite the proud, cheering mom. She was in the bleachers seated near me. She was accompanied by Brett’s older brother… a high schooler. Each time Brett touched the ball, the bleachers would rumble as his mom offered a robust, “Way to go Brett!” or “You got this Brett!” or “Come on team!”

The “Come on team” was not as much a cheer as it was a strong encouragement for the team to work together and play better.

As Brett’s mom would root for the students (and mostly for Brett), I could hear some of the kids begin to heckle her. It was mostly the girls seated in the row ahead of me. Their harsh words aimed at Brett’s mom turned from murmuring to outright rudeness. They tossed arrogant comments, such as, “That’s enough, just keep it down,” or “Be quiet,” or “No one wants to hear you yell” or '“Stop the cheering.” Their harsh comments were accompanied with laughter, and finger pointing - all in an attempt to ridicule or shame her.

All the while, Brett’s older brother, who was proudly seated next to their mom, was showing 100% support. More than just support - he was encouraging her and letting everyone know that he “stood with his mom.”

Brett’s mom was unmoved by the heckling jeers from the 9th grade girls. In fact, she had some guidance for the young ladies. She advised the girls know that in the following year, when in high school - this is what fans do. They cheer. “So you better get used to it,” she instructed back to the stunned girls.

As I sat there watching the game within the game, I thought that when the basketball game ended, Brett would stop to greet the “girls” and perhaps pretend that he did not hear his mom’s cheering, or the war that was raging in the bleachers. After all, those girls were popular, and his mom did not impress them at all. So, who would he choose? Who was his audience?

I do not remember who won the game that day. But, I do remember that as the game ended Brett ran towards the girls. I thought - Oh, he is going to hug those popular girls and hang out them. I was wrong. His pace did not slow down as he approached the girls, rather he continued in full stride and ran up the bleachers. He stopped when he got to his mom, and gave her a hug. In a confident, loud voice he thanked her for the awesome support, and let her know that her encouragement helped him to play better.

The girls looked stunned. Brett’s mother and brother looked proud.

I was shocked… but in a good way. That event has stayed with me. It reminds me that no matter what the peer-pressure or concern about what others may think… do what is right! Know who is in your corner and stick with them. Be loyal. Be true to yourself.

We all have an audience of one. Who are you playing for? Who is your audience?

Learn more about how to “Do The Right Thing” in the youth-fiction novel, The Blessing Effect.